Its a strange weekend: nothing really happened as it was spent mostly sleeping to fight this bout of flu, but the few things that occurred were worth pondering about. Yet, as much as I know I have many things to write but do not know which one. As a teenager, our father went through the same jitters about that first date, about that day when he popped the question to our mother, the anxiety to build a family, yet making do for himself whilst sacrificing for us - he is as clueless in these matters as we do now.
As a husband and a father, we see him as the one who is slightly more detached with our daily problems - always asking mom to deal with it, as the one who is non-emotional to issues, as the dictator perhaps for some. But in effect, he is the silent pillar in our family, and if we are brave enough to admit, the silent pillar in our lives.
I cannot say much about when a father is of old age as I lost my father in my late teenage years - and that lost is still fresh in my mind, even today. It was as if yesterday, that my father carried me in his arms or put his over my shoulders as we walked in the park. It was as if last night that he read me to sleep...
I always remembered him as a loving and doting father who thinks more of us than of himself. One that lives forever in me... as most fathers do.
One can never describe a lost which is part of oneself. Yet, Allah the Almighty said: "Every living soul shall have a taste of death, and in the end to Us shall you be brought back" ... al-Ankabut 29:57
I am comforted with the fact that he has left us for a better place which he justly deserves. Amin...
So, this is a tribute to my dad, to new and old fathers, to fathers-to-be, and yet even to those who guides, teaches, and mentor others: you are fathers too ... at least in my eyes. You are the unspoken heroes in our lives. You are the inspiration when we ourselves become fathers, eventually.
Al-Fatihah ...
"I'd love to dance with my father again ..."
Dance With My Father Again
Back when I was a child
Before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high
And dance with my mother and me and then
Spin me around till I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry me
And I knew for sure
I was loved
If I could get another chance
Another walk, another dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
How I’d love, love, love to dance with my father again
Ooh, ooh
When I and my mother would disagree
To get my way I would run from her to him
He’d make me laugh just to comfort me, yeah, yeah
Then finally make me do just what my mama said
Later that night when I was asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
Never dreamed that he
Would be gone from me
If I could steal one final glance
One final step, one final dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
‘Cause I’d love, love, love to dance with my father again
Sometimes I’d listen outside her door
And I’d hear her, mama crying for him
I pray for her even more than me
I pray for her even more than me
I know I’m praying for much too much
But could You send back the only man she loved
I know You don’t do it usually
But Lord, she’s dying to dance with my father again
Every night I fall asleep
And this is all I ever dream
10 comments:
i Quote SupermaN from his Movie, "Superman Returns":
"You will be different, sometimes you'll feel like an outcast, but you'll never be alone. You will make my strength your own. You will see my life through your eyes, as your life will be seen through mine. The son becomes the father and the father becomes the son."
So apt. How it descriBes that @one point in time, our Life comes full circle. (",)
I know what it feels like, losing someone so dear to you. I guess, you can try to understand and symphatize but you won't know what it feels like until you feel the loss.
We can all seek solace that he/she is somewhere in a better place now.
I can't imagine not having my Dad around.
I supposed then we have to treasure what we have, no matter how at that moment, we normally felt we have so little - but on hindsight, it was worth all the world... but it would be too late.
Embrace those who are still around us: families and friends...
your entry brought tears to my eyes. i have not experienced losing my father, but i have experienced 2 possible experiences. Allah saved him and gave me a little while more to spend my days with him. i have a very special relationship with my father - one that i want my own child to have with my hubby. my father is my confidante and my motivator, my laughter and my tears. watching him grow old have been very difficult for me. he will forever be my #1.
The exquisite scheme of natural things is such that what we see in them and how they are or what they represent - is what we, under normal circumstances, would turn out to be in our mature years, despite how hard some of us try to resist.
Scary for some, beautiful for most of us ...
The father-son relationship is a unique one - never clear-cut, sometimes clear, other times vague. But as sons we continually seek acceptance from our fathers, as they are a part of us.
Our job is to seek from our Lord their well-being and happiness always.
Amin to that, nunbun
Never doubt even for a moment that my Dad is exquisitely precious. Thanks for the reminder.
Thehoopoe, thanks for the Van Dross song. It's indeed very beautiful.
No worries ... now that he has moved on to another world himself, how fortunate for him to leave this song behind for his own.
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