Brothers & Sisters

I have been glued to the telly every late Monday nights to catch the current ABC'c drama entitled "Brothers & Sisters". It has a tight ensemble and script, led by some great actors and actresses in the business. But, best of all, the show is not pretentious and is real with all the possible problems faced by some families.

The compelling one-hour drama series, which airs on Monday nights, is about a collection of five enmeshed and somewhat damaged adult siblings and their strong but passionately devoted mother, Nora Walker (Oscar and Emmy Award winner Sally Field). The Walkers' lives have not been without challenge; romance, parenting, divorce, infidelity, addiction, war and even death have pushed each of them to the limit, but they continue to work toward living their lives as individuals, while loving each other unconditionally and trying to maintain some semblance of normalcy after the loss of their larger-than-life family patriarch, William Walker.

Eldest sibling Sarah Whedon (Emmy Award nominee Rachel Griffiths) is a mother of two who left a prestigious corporate job to spend time with her family and run Ojai Foods. After finding the business in ruins, she fights to salvage what's left of her failing marriage and keep Ojai alive. Kevin (Matthew Rhys) is an openly gay lawyer who is cautiously learning about love while keeping the family out of legal trouble. Loyal middle brother Tommy Walker (Balthazar Getty) struggles to provide the emotional support needed by his beautiful wife, Julia (Sarah Jane Morris), and their vulnerable newborn daughter, Elizabeth, while risking everything to open a winery with his father's lifelong mistress, Holly Harper (Patricia Wettig). The baby of the family, Justin (Dave Annable), struggles with war trauma and addiction, while Kitty (Calista Flockhart) hits the campaign trail alongside Republican presidential candidate Senator Robert McCallister (Rob Lowe) - her boss and fiancé.

Saul Holden (Ron Rifkin) is the emotional pillar of the Walker family, struggling to keep Ojai Foods above water while grappling with his own identity. Rebecca (Emily VanCamp) is the illegitimate daughter of William Walker and Holly, who was kept secret for two decades but now seeks a way to fit into this very complex family puzzle.

So you see, it is not the usual glamorous (at least not in lifestyle) sitcom but a complicated one. And with each family problems they faced, it brings them closer together and along with it, its own charm that keeps many glued to it every Monday.

This entry was inspired by the repeated trailers on telly now. Accompanying the trailer, is a gorgeous song by Embrace entitled "Gravity". It is a wonderful song. I have made an earlier entry of this song, but I am so in love with this song that I wanna put it up here again.

Embrace the beauty of "Gravity", yet again :)

Of Whirling Dervishes

Just returned from a full-capacity performance of the Whirling Dervish at the Singapore Esplanade. It was charming and surreal, yet I have seen a more enrapturing and enchanting performance in a smaller and more cosy setting. The performance started well with an introduction of the whirl celebrating the 800th birthday of its founding father, the revered Mevlana Jalalludin Rumi. But from the many uninitiated, they have asked me what the circular movements were all about. If only they had more background knowledge, I believe they would be able to appreciate more the performance, which to the practitioners, is actually a religious act.

The Mevlevi Order is a Sufi order founded by the followers of Mevlana Jalalludin Rumi in 1273 in Konya (present-day Turkey). They are also known as the Whirling Dervishes due to their famous practice of whirling as a form of dhikr (remembrance of Allah). Dervish is a common term for an initiate of the Sufi Path. The Mevlevi sect belongs to the Sunni or orthodox mainstream of Islam. Its doctrine never developed a revolutionary strategy - and although it was occasionally criticized for its heretical ideas, it always enjoyed the respect of the officialdom.

The Mevlevi or "The Whirling Dervishes" believe in performing their dhikr in the form of a "dance" and music ceremony called the sema. The Sema represents a mystical journey of man's spiritual ascent through mind and love to the "Perfect." Turning towards the truth, the follower grows through love, deserts his ego, finds the truth and arrives at the "Perfect." He then returns from this spiritual journey as a man who has reached maturity and a greater perfection, so as to love and to be of service to the whole of creation.

The sema was practiced in the semahane (ritual hall) according to a precisely prescribed symbolic ritual with the dervished whirling in a circle around their shaykh, who is the only one circling around his axis. The dervishes wear a white gown (as a symbol of death), a wide black cloak (hirka) (as a symbol of the grave) and a high brown cap (kûlah) (as a symbol of the tombstone). The fundamental condition of our existence is to revolve. There is no object, no being which does not revolve. The shared similarity between all created things is the revolution of the electrons, protons, and neutrons within the atoms that constitute their basic structure. From the smallest cell to the planets and the farthest stars, everything takes part in this revolving. Thus, the Semazens, the ones who whirl, participate consciously in the shared revolution of all existence.

The rituals of the Whirling Dervishes are among the enduring as well as the most exquisite ceremonies of spirituality. The ritual whirling of the dervishes is an act of love and a drama of faith. It possesses a highly structured form within which the gentle turns become increasingly dynamic as the individual dervishes strive to achieve a state of trans. The music that accompanies the whirling from beginning to end ranges from somber to rhapsodical; its effect is intended to be mesmerizing. Chanting of poetry, rhythmic rotation, and incessant music create a synthesis which, according to the faithful, induces a feeling of soaring, of ecstasy, of mystical flight.

The semazens stand with their arms crossed, ready to begin their turn. In their erect posture, they represent the number one, testifying to God's unity. Each rotation takes them past the shaykh, who stands on a red sheep skin. This is the place of the Mevlana Rumi, and the shaykh is understood to be a channel for the divine grace. At the start of each of the four movements of the ceremony, the semazens bow to each other honoring the spirit within. As their arms unfold, the right hand opens to the skies in prayer, ready to receive God's beneficence. The left hand, upon which his gaze rests, is turned towards the earth in the gesture of bestowal.

Fix-footed, the semazen provides a point of contact with this Earth through which the divine blessings can flow. Turning from right to left, he embraces all creation as he chants the name of God within the heart. The Sema ritual consists of seven parts:

(1) It starts with the singing of the eulogy to the Prophet Muhammed (saw), who represents love. Praising him is praising the truth of God that he and all the prophets before him brought.

(2) Then follows the call of the drum and the slap of glory, calling the semazens to awaken and "Be". This begins the procession known as the Sultan-Walad Walk. It is the salutation of one soul to another, acknowledged by bowing.

(3) Then begins the Sema ritual itself. It consists of four salams or salutations. The first salam is the birth of truth by way of knowledge. The second salam expresses the rapture of witnessing the splendor of creation. The third salam is the transformation of rapture into love; the sacrifice of mind and self to love. It represents complete submission and communion with God. The fourth salam is the semazen's coming to terms with his destiny and his return to his task in creation. In the fourth salam, the shaykh enters the circling dervishes, where he assumes the place of the sun in the center of the circling planets.

(4) The Sema ends with a recitation from the Qur'an. The shaykh and dervishes complete their time together with the greeting of peace and then depart, accompanied by joyous music of their departure.

One of the beauties of this seven-centuries-old ritual is the way that it unifies the three fundamental components of man's nature; mind, emotion, and spirit, combining them in a practice and a worship that seeks the purification of all three in the turning towards Divine Unity. But most significantly, the enrichment of this earth and the well-being of humanity as a whole.

Ash Wednesday

Been absorbed reading the genious of T S Eliot today to the point of sharing with you two consecutive entries.

Born Thomas Stearns Eliot (1888-1965), he was a poet, dramatist and literary critic. He received the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1948. He wrote the famous poems "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock", "The Waste Land", "The Hollow Men", "Ash Wednesday", and "Four Quartets"; the plays "Murder in the Cathedral" and "The Cocktail Party"; and the essay "Tradition and the Individual Talent".

"Ash Wednesday" is the first long poem written by Eliot after his 1927 conversion to Anglicanism. Published in 1930, this poem deals with the struggle that ensues when one who has lack of faith in the past strives to move towards God.

Sometimes referred to as Eliot's "conversion poem", Ash Wednesday, with a base of Dante's Purgatorio, is richly but ambiguously allusive and deals with the aspiration to move from spiritual barrenness to hope for human salvation. The style is different from his poetry which predates his conversion. "Ash Wednesday" and the poems that followed had a more casual, melodic, and contemplative method.

Ash Wednesday
By T S Eliot

Because I do not hope to turn again
Because I do not hope
Because I do not hope to turn
Desiring this man's gift and that man's scope
I no longer strive to strive towards such things
(Why should the agèd eagle stretch its wings?)
Why should I mourn
The vanished power of the usual reign?

Because I do not hope to know
The infirm glory of the positive hour
Because I do not think
Because I know I shall not know
The one veritable transitory power
Because I cannot drink
There, where trees flower, and springs flow, for there is
nothing again

Because I know that time is always time
And place is always and only place
And what is actual is actual only for one time
And only for one place
I rejoice that things are as they are and
I renounce the blessèd face
And renounce the voice
Because I cannot hope to turn again
Consequently I rejoice, having to construct something
Upon which to rejoice

And pray to God to have mercy upon us
And pray that I may forget
These matters that with myself I too much discuss
Too much explain
Because I do not hope to turn again
Let these words answer
For what is done, not to be done again
May the judgement not be too heavy upon us

Because these wings are no longer wings to fly
But merely vans to beat the air
The air which is now thoroughly small and dry
Smaller and dryer than the will
Teach us to care and not to care Teach us to sit still.

Pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death
Pray for us now and at the hour of our death.

II
Lady, three white leopards sat under a juniper-tree
In the cool of the day, having fed to sateity
On my legs my heart my liver and that which had been contained
In the hollow round of my skull. And God said
Shall these bones live? shall these
Bones live? And that which had been contained
In the bones (which were already dry) said chirping:
Because of the goodness of this Lady
And because of her loveliness, and because
She honours the Virgin in meditation,
We shine with brightness. And I who am here dissembled
Proffer my deeds to oblivion, and my love
To the posterity of the desert and the fruit of the gourd.
It is this which recovers
My guts the strings of my eyes and the indigestible portions
Which the leopards reject. The Lady is withdrawn
In a white gown, to contemplation, in a white gown.
Let the whiteness of bones atone to forgetfulness.
There is no life in them. As I am forgotten
And would be forgotten, so I would forget
Thus devoted, concentrated in purpose. And God said
Prophesy to the wind, to the wind only for only
The wind will listen. And the bones sang chirping
With the burden of the grasshopper, saying:

Lady of silences
Calm and distressed
Torn and most whole
Rose of memory
Rose of forgetfulness
Exhausted and life-giving
Worried reposeful
The single Rose
Is now the Garden
Where all loves end
Terminate torment
Of love unsatisfied
The greater torment
Of love satisfied
End of the endless
Journey to no end
Conclusion of all that
Is inconclusible
Speech without word and
Word of no speech
Grace to the Mother
For the Garden
Where all love ends.

Under a juniper-tree the bones sang, scattered and shining
We are glad to be scattered, we did little good to each other,
Under a tree in the cool of day, with the blessing of sand,
Forgetting themselves and each other, united
In the quiet of the desert. This is the land which ye
Shall divide by lot. And neither division nor unity
Matters. This is the land. We have our inheritance.

III
At the first turning of the second stair
I turned and saw below
The same shape twisted on the banister
Under the vapour in the fetid air
Struggling with the devil of the stairs who wears
The deceitul face of hope and of despair.

At the second turning of the second stair
I left them twisting, turning below;
There were no more faces and the stair was dark,
Damp, jaggèd, like an old man's mouth drivelling, beyond
repair,
Or the toothed gullet of an agèd shark.

At the first turning of the third stair
Was a slotted window bellied like the figs's fruit
And beyond the hawthorn blossom and a pasture scene
The broadbacked figure drest in blue and green
Enchanted the maytime with an antique flute.
Blown hair is sweet, brown hair over the mouth blown,
Lilac and brown hair;
Distraction, music of the flute, stops and steps of the mind
over the third stair,
Fading, fading; strength beyond hope and despair
Climbing the third stair.

Lord, I am not worthy
Lord, I am not worthy
but speak the word only.

IV
Who walked between the violet and the violet
Whe walked between
The various ranks of varied green
Going in white and blue, in Mary's colour,
Talking of trivial things
In ignorance and knowledge of eternal dolour
Who moved among the others as they walked,
Who then made strong the fountains and made fresh the
springs

Made cool the dry rock and made firm the sand
In blue of larkspur, blue of Mary's colour,
Sovegna vos

Here are the years that walk between, bearing
Away the fiddles and the flutes, restoring
One who moves in the time between sleep and waking,
wearing

White light folded, sheathing about her, folded.
The new years walk, restoring
Through a bright cloud of tears, the years, restoring
With a new verse the ancient rhyme. Redeem
The time. Redeem
The unread vision in the higher dream
While jewelled unicorns draw by the gilded hearse.

The silent sister veiled in white and blue
Between the yews, behind the garden god,
Whose flute is breathless, bent her head and signed but
spoke no word

But the fountain sprang up and the bird sang down
Redeem the time, redeem the dream
The token of the word unheard, unspoken

Till the wind shake a thousand whispers from the yew
And after this our exile

V
If the lost word is lost, if the spent word is spent
If the unheard, unspoken
Word is unspoken, unheard;
Still is the unspoken word, the Word unheard,
The Word without a word, the Word within
The world and for the world;
And the light shone in darkness and
Against the Word the unstilled world still whirled
About the centre of the silent Word.

O my people, what have I done unto thee.

Where shall the word be found, where will the word
Resound? Not here, there is not enough silence
Not on the sea or on the islands, not
On the mainland, in the desert or the rain land,
For those who walk in darkness
Both in the day time and in the night time
The right time and the right place are not here
No place of grace for those who avoid the face
No time to rejoice for those who walk among noise and deny
the voice

Will the veiled sister pray for
Those who walk in darkness, who chose thee and oppose thee,
Those who are torn on the horn between season and season,
time and time, between
Hour and hour, word and word, power and power, those who wait
In darkness? Will the veiled sister pray
For children at the gate
Who will not go away and cannot pray:
Pray for those who chose and oppose

O my people, what have I done unto thee.

Will the veiled sister between the slender
Yew trees pray for those who offend her
And are terrified and cannot surrender
And affirm before the world and deny between the rocks
In the last desert before the last blue rocks
The desert in the garden the garden in the desert
Of drouth, spitting from the mouth the withered apple-seed.

O my people.

VI
Although I do not hope to turn again
Although I do not hope
Although I do not hope to turn

Wavering between the profit and the loss
In this brief transit where the dreams cross
The dreamcrossed twilight between birth and dying
(Bless me father) though I do not wish to wish these things
From the wide window towards the granite shore
The white sails still fly seaward, seaward flying
Unbroken wings

And the lost heart stiffens and rejoices
In the lost lilac and the lost sea voices
And the weak spirit quickens to rebel
For the bent golden-rod and the lost sea smell
Quickens to recover
The cry of quail and the whirling plover
And the blind eye creates
The empty forms between the ivory gates
And smell renews the salt savour of the sandy earth

This is the time of tension between dying and birth
The place of solitude where three dreams cross
Between blue rocks
But when the voices shaken from the yew-tree drift away
Let the other yew be shaken and reply.

Blessèd sister, holy mother, spirit of the fountain, spirit of the
garden,
Suffer us not to mock ourselves with falsehood
Teach us to care and not to care
Teach us to sit still
Even among these rocks,
Our peace in His will
And even among these rocks
Sister, mother
And spirit of the river, spirit of the sea,
Suffer me not to be separated

And let my cry come unto Thee.

Reaching Full Circle

"We must never cease from exploration.

And the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we began

and to know the place for the first time"

... T S Eliot

California

Its been a while since I put up a music entry. A song that has been playing in my mind was "California" by the Phantom Planets. Moons ago, I remembered watching The O.C. just to catch this title track. In my 'dictionary', there is always place for a well-crafted, unapologetically pop-music :)

"California" is a song from Phantom Planet's 2002 album, The Guest. The song is about driving on U.S. Route 101, travelling to see a concert. (Paradoxically, the 101's southern terminus is in Los Angeles; it does not reach Orange County :)

The first season's soundtrack for The O.C. is also pretty good. This song is a great driving-song. It has a 'freedom' feeling to it. Enjoy!

Fasting In Syawal

It is the month of Syawal: a month of joy and a month of freedom. We should also not consider Ramadhan as the only month for us to perform ibadah.

If in Ramadhan we had controlled our tongues from talking or conversing inappropriately, we should continue to do so for the rest of our lives. If in Ramadhan we had controlled our eyes from looking at things most despicable, it does not mean that after Ramadhan, we could return to our old ways.

Perhaps there are among us who feel that there were many shortcomings done in the last Ramadhan. Perhaps the ibadah were not performed perfectly and perhaps missed the opportunity to get the benefits of the 1000 months.

Verily Allah, The Almighty offers us the opportunity to His servants. It is up to us to seize the opportunity.

In this month, there are many acts which can be performed to complement and continue from our acts in the past month.

The complementary ibadah referred to is the six days fast in the month of Syawal - whether it is performed continuously or alternately in Syawal. The fast of 6 days in Syawal has many benefits. Amongst them, as reported in a hadith which means: He who fasts in the month of Ramadhan followed by 6 days in Syawal, it is as if he has fasted for 1 year.

It means that if you complete the fast of 1 month of Ramadhan and continue with 6 days of fasting in Syawal, you will be rewarded with the rewards of someone who has fast for 1 full year.

If we analyse that hadith, we can conclude that it corresponds to Allah’s commands in Surah Al An’am verse 160 which means: "He that does good will have ten times as much to his credit. He that does evil shall only be recompensed according to His evil. No wrong shall be done unto any of them."

From this verse, we can see that the 30 days of fasting that we have endured in Ramadhan equates to 10 months of fasting! And the 6 days of fasting in Syawal would equate to 2 months. Thus, we will complete 12 months of fasting, which would equate to fasting for 1 whole year!

This is explained in another hadith which means: "Allah will reward every good act ten times over. And so 1 month of good deeds will sow the equivalent of 10 months of rewards. And 6 days after 'Eid Fitr completes the 1 year."

This is the benefit Allah has offered to us for us to reap. For those who may have missed the benefits from the previous months, this is an opportunity which you should not miss. The 6 days of fasting in Syawal is like a Rawatib prayer that completes any incomplete prayer. And surely in the course of our fasting in Ramadhan there must have been numerous mistakes that we have made. By fasting 6 days in Syawal, it creates an opportunity for us to atone for those mistakes in our fasting.

Let us increase our ibadah in this significant month in Islam. And may our good deeds be rewarded and accepted by Allah, The Almighty.

... excerpts taken from MUIS' Friday Sermon dated 21 December 2001.

Of Raising Children

On the last day of terawih, had a long conversation with a good friend over many topics - one of which was the manner in which we should aspire to raise our children - a trust from The Almighty which we took upon ourselves. The challenges that they will face in the future are really beyond our imagination and comprehension. Their life's challenges - will be very unlike ours. So, we must always look to them with compassion and mercy.

It is not in dispensing our "wise" solutions to their specific problems. To me, the key is in giving our children the "formulae" to deal with the varied challenges that will be laid before them. So come what may and in what form, a good "formula" that they can easily apply will go a long way in assisting our children face life's challenges with confidence and dignity.

And, as in many other things in life, the exemplary example must start from us - now. This is because our children are watching us... and they are following our example: albeit good and bad.

"Train up your child in the way he should go."

Beauty In What You Do

"Let the beauty of what you love, be what you do."

... Mevlana Jalalludin Rumi

'Eid Mubarak!

Allahu Akbar Allahuakbar Allahuakbar
Laa ilahaillallahuallahuakbar
Allahu Akbar Walillahilham

'Eid-ul-Fitri is celebrated to signify the victory of Muslims over their desires, achieved through fasting in the month of Ramadhan. It is hoped that fasting in the blessed month of Ramadhan has made us more reflective and given us renewed strength and commitment to strive to become better Muslims, to contribute more to our families, to our community and to the world.

Allah, The Almighty commanded us to celebrate this victory in al-Baqarah verse 185: "And you must complete the same number (of days), and that you must magnify Allah (through saying the takbir) for having guided you so that you may be grateful to Him."

This 'Eid celebration ranks highly in the eyes of Allah (swt), because it is the fruit of our battle against our own desires and which brings about the quality of “taqwa” in a Muslim as desired by Allah in the verse “la’allakum tattaqun.

It would therefore be ironical if in the midst of our celebrations, we choose to suspend or slacken our obligations to Allah. Let us continue and remain steadfast in our service to Allah and hopefully our labour in Ramadhan does not go to waste in Syawal, Amin, Ya Rabb!

'Eid Mubarak!
Minal 'a'idin wal faizin wal maqbulin. Kullu 'am wa antum bi khair!

Being Thankful

On this last night of Ramadhan, I was flooded by a sense of lost.

I had a splendid time being invited to my Shaykh's house to break my fast for the last time this month. We prayed congregation together, recited the takbir as is the usual on the eve of 'Eid and, as usual between my Shaykh and me, bantered intimately throughout. Ummi was always lamenting how I should visit them more frequently - the fault is entirely mine. I am guided by two Shaykhs and in more ways than they can ever imagine (but being such noble and saintly men as they both are, I am sure they both know), both my Shaykhs are indeed father-figure to me.

As the call for Isyak prayers was overheard over the radio, I felt a sudden sense of lost. Lost as my established monthly routine has been 'dismantled': there was no more rush to the mosque to perform the congregational Isyak and terawih prayers, no more crowds to be found in the mosque, no more exquisite recitations of the Holy Qur'an by my favourite guest Imam, no more tea/milkshakes after prayers etc. When I was younger, I used to think it corny when my Shaykh told me how blessed and sweet food tasted when you broke your fast. To me, then, briyani rice, is, briyani rice. But, having matured over the years and hopefully obtained more understanding and insight to the knowledge given to me, I realised instead that I was the corny one: even a sip of mineral water tasted ever so sweet and appetizing, and a few handfuls of rice was sufficient to satiate my hunger.

The whole routine has changed tonight. On the one hand, it will be difficult to let those beautiful experiences wither away with the advent of the month of Syawal, but as the experiences of many other blessings, they sometimes have to be "lost" to enable their value be truly realised. New experiences will surface and new sweetness will be felt. As life itself, we will need to embrace new frontiers with the benefits of what this Ramadhan has equipped us for the coming months.

So this feeling of "lost" is diabolical: sad, yet inspiring. It reminds me of the consistent approach in Islam: fear and hope.

Another main lesson I learnt is that nonetheless, I should remain ever so grateful to The Almighty. A prophetic story of Prophet Yunus (as) came to mind: When Prophet Yunus departed full of wrath because his people would not believe, he neither sought Allah's permission nor did he fulfill his mission. He travelled by ship, but the ship was fully loaded and met with foul weather. The passengers decided to draw lots to see who would jump into the water. When Yunus drew the short lot, the other passengers stopped him due to his noble reputation and they drew lots again. The lot fell on Yunus. For the third time they drew lots, and it fell again on Yunus. The incident inside the belly of the whale is familiar to us, but Allah said:

"So We responded to him and delivered him from the grief, and thus do We deliver the believers" ... Al-Anbiyaa' 21:88

Prophet Yunus recognized his test as a blessing and was thankful that Allah, The Most High had blessed him with such a unique place — the belly of the whale — to worship Him.

Such stories in the Qur'an are lessons for us to reflect upon and learn from. In spite of Allah's giving us the Qur'an as a mercy and a guide, we are more often than not sometimes ungrateful. Through our lack of appreciation, we fall into lapses.

"Then I will certainly come to them from before them and from behind them, and from their right-hand side and from their left-hand side; and Thou shalt not find most of them thankful" ... Al-A`raf 7:17

So, let us all together be thankful to The Merciful for He said: "Therefore remember Me, and I will remember you: be thankful to Me, and do not be ungrateful to Me" ... al-Baqarah 2:152

Mathematically Speaking

Mathematically speaking (and it is never the point mathematically in matters of ibadah), you will find your achievements in Ramadhan rather startling.

Wajib prayers:
17 rakaats per day x 30 days = 510 rakaats

Sunnah prayers (ba'dia/qabliah):
14 rakaats (Syafie) per day x 30 days = 420 rakaats

Other superregotary prayers/qiyammulail:
16 rakaats per day (assumptions made) x 30 days = 480 rakaats

Terawih:
1 day 20 rakaats x 30 days = 600 rakaats

Witr:
1 day 3 rakaats (min) x 30 days = 90 rakaats

Congreagational rewards:
510 rakaats + 420 rakaats + 480 rakaats + 600 rakaats + 90 rakaats x 27 rewards = 56,700 rewards

Seclusion in the mosque:
Infinity

Waiting for prayers while in state of purity:
Infinity

Fasting:
30 days - Reward is only with Allah. Infinity

Hearing Imam recite and khatm Qur'an:
1 reward per alphabet = infinity

Reciting the Qur'an:
1 reward per alphabet = infinity
plus reward for recitation

Memorising parts of the Qur'an:
Infinity

Charity:
Infinity

Obligatory Zakat:
Infinity

Doa:
Granted

Sunnah deeds:
Rewarded as an obligatory deeds

Sincerity in Ramadhan:
Up to 700 times the reward for a single act, or more

For example: 56,700 x 700 = 39,690,000

and then, there are also others ....

No need to argue with me on the exact calculation, for I am no expert in Math. But, I'd like to believe that the point is made through them.

Subhan-Allah!

For those who have tried and persevered (not mathematically or literally), then the 'Eid is indeed a celebration of success for you, insya-Allah. May The Almighty grants you more success.

For those who have not, the chance is now lost. Pray that you will meet Ramadhan again next year, Amin.

Our Friend Is Leaving Us

In the tender melancholy of tonight, the Imam will khatm (complete) the recitation of the Qur'an during the night prayers (terawih). For everyday since the commencement of the month of Ramadhan, they have been reading one juz (section) of the Qur'an within the prayer and tonight will see the conclusion of those beautiful recitation that the congregation has been used to.

The fasting will end in two days' time and the blessed month of Ramadhan will leave us. We never know for sure if our 'friend' were to approach us next year again, we will still be alive to embrace 'him' and seize the opportunity that 'he' provides.

As for me, this will be my last Ramadhan here in Singapore before I proceed to the next phase of my life. Personally, this has been a very special Ramadhan celebrated with close friends at and from different places. They will stay in my heart. Come next year, insya-Allah, I will welcome Ramadhan alone at a place far, far away from here. I hope to meet wonderful friends and companions as those whom I have grown up with here in Singapore.

Despite the distance, those who really matter to us are always close - in our hearts, in our memories, in the things we say and do, even in the places that we travel. They are a part of us, no matter which way we look - we carry them with us wherever we go.

And I thank The Almighty for that blessing.

The Opportunity

The opportunity of Laylatul Qadr is here. Life is about people that take advantage of their opportunities to win the love of Allah (swt), and this is indeed one of those chances.

Abu Dah Daah was one of those who found an opportunity and won that which is greater than the heavens and the earth. An adult companion of the Prophet (saw) cultivated his garden next to the property of an orphan. The orphan claimed that a specific palm tree was on his property and thus belonged to him. The companion rejected the claim and off to the Messenger of Allah (saw) went the orphan boy to complain. With his justness, the Messenger of Allah (saw) measured the two gardens and found that the palm tree did indeed belong to the companion. The orphan erupted crying. Seeing this, the Prophet (saw) offered the companion, “would you give him the palm tree and to you is a palm tree in Jannah?” However, the companion in his disbelief that an orphan would complain to the Prophet (saw) missed the opportunity and went away angry.

But someone else saw the opportunity, Abu Dah Daah (ra). He went to the Prophet (saw) and asked, “Ya Rasul Allah, if I buy the tree from him and give it to the orphan shall I have that tree in Jannah?” The Messenger of Allah (saw) replied, “Yes.”

Abu Dah Daah chased after the companion and asked, “Would you sell that tree to me for my entire garden?” The companion answered, “Take it for there is no good in a tree that I was complained to the Prophet about.”

Immediately, Abu Dah Daah went home and found his wife and children playing in the garden. “Leave the garden!” shouted Abu Dah Daah, “we’ve sold it to Allah! We’ve sold it to Allah!” Some of his children had dates in their hand and he snatched the dates from them and threw them back into the garden. “We’ve sold it to Allah!”

When Abu Dah Daah was later martyred in the battle of Uhud, Rasul Allah (saw) stood over his slain body and remarked, “How many shady palm trees does Abu Dah Daah now have in paradise?”

What did Abu Dah Daah lose? What did he gain? He gained a Jannah whose expanse is the heavens and the earth.

Abu Dah Daah did not miss his opportunity, and I pray to Allah (swt) that we do not miss our opportunity of standing to Allah (swt) on Laylatul Qadr.

... excerpts from When A Night Becomes A Thousand, Muhammad alShareef

The Bird

Imam Qusheri had a favourite student and people noticed that he liked him, other students became jealous. So he set all of his students a test, to kill this bird but do it where nobody is watching. The students came back one by one with their birds killed except the favourite student. He said, “I couldn’t find any spot where no one was looking.” The other students stopped and realised why he liked him so much. (He always knew that Allah, The Almighty was always looking at him.)

Its (Nearly) Crunch Time

Tonight, two of the three musketeers did terawih together. We were suddenly swept by the startling realization that it is crunch time (nearly). Our oral and mental test will be this Saturday on Chapter 36 of the Holy Qur'an. We realised that we still have a long way to go... and it is a mere 2 days away. Gosh!

I was originally slotted to lead the night vigil at a local mosque this Saturday, but I figured this is "Top Priority". I will try to get another Imam to replace me, insya-Allah.

Being the more 'brutal' of the three, I further suggested that perhaps, if our aim was not accomplished by the end of this Ramadhan, then a penalty is definitely in order. What that will be, shall be decided tomorrow after Friday prayers. I have in mind feeding the orphans or making a 'huge' donation to charity - either way, we benefit despite memorising surah Ya-sin or not. Alhamdulillah! Now... how to convince the other two musketeers tomorrow....

When we did our preliminaries tonight, we also spoke about how much easier it was to memorise those verses if we knew the meaning to them, and Alhamdulillah, all three of us are Arabic-friendly speaking musketeers.

But importantly, we also spoke about some verses of that chapter which sent shivers down our spine when reminded of the Day of Judgment and if things do turn out adversely for us - for there is nothing that we can hide from the Creator. In this chapter, Allah said: "Verily We shall give life to the dead, and We record that which they send before and that which they leave behind, and of all things have We taken account in a clear Book (of evidence)" ... Ya-Sin 36:12.

Surely we look forward to be placed in this category and "It was said: "Enter thou the Garden." He said: "Ah me! Would that my People knew (what I know)!- For that my Lord has granted me Forgiveness and has enrolled me among those held in honour!" ... Ya-Sin 36:26-27. Amin.

This exemplifies clearly the concept of "hope" and "fear" that Muslims live by. Hope - that Allah will accept our deeds and ignore our shortcomings, yet Fear - that maybe, perhaps what we did was not good enough. This balances things out - so we don't walk about the Earth with our heads held too high or too low. As His Creations, we perform what we have been tasked to do - and that is our responsibility which we have to account for on the Day of Judgment. What Allah does with our deeds is His prerogative - and we will never know how we will be dealt with in the end. Hence, we hope and yet we fear at the same time... That keeps us alive! Subhan-Allah!

Therefore, coming back to our memorisation exercise, despite daunted by the impossible, the three musketeers will put our Faith in Him and hope that our efforts will be blessed, insya-Allah. That is the only surety for success - for The Almighty also said in the same chapter: "Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "Be", and it is! So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will ye be all brought back" ... Ya-Sin 36:82-83

One Thousand And One Nights

In this last 10 days of Ramadhan, there is increased recitation of surah al-Qadr all over our mosques - reminding us of the great impending gift of this 'Night of Power'.

"We have indeed revealed this (Message) in the Night of Power:

And what will explain to thee what the Night of Power is?

The Night of Power is better than a thousand Months.

Therein come down the angels and the Spirit by God's Permission,

on every errand"

Peace! ... This until the rise of Morn!" ... al-Qadr 97:1-5

Been thinking about this "one thousand months" that was referred to in this verse and was reminded of the hadith that was asked by the companion comparing the deeds of the people of old and the people of this generation. Subhan-Allah! Indeed, we are truly blessed to be the Ummah of the Prophet (saw)!

But, my "wayward" mind was also reminded of something else. I searched my library and found the "gem" that I was looking for: "The Arabian Nights" or what is more commonly known in Arabic as "Alf Laylah wa Laylah" translated to mean "One Thousand and One Nights". Here I have in my hands, a rare copy in Singapore of the 'complete and unabridged' version of the book - all 837 pages of it, literally translated by Sir Richard F Burton - who himself is a colourful character. What follows is a selected quote from the Introduction:

"Who told the stories first, or in what tongue, we cannot surely say... The stories are the thing, no matter whence they sprang nor when... Whatever their origin in time and space, the tales themselves promise to be timeless and free of all frontiers. For they form, let it be said boldly, the world's greatest single treasure house of fiction, and their riches are for all men. So long as there are ears to hear, Shahrazad will be heard.

The spell of the Nights has possessed the imagination of mankind, and one need not read far in them to find the reason. The world which they describe is, like Cabell's world of Poictesme, one in which anything is more than likely to happen; in which almost everything does happen. The most delightful, most atrocious, most ludicrous things. It is a world of magic and reality, of sweet day-dreams and shivering awakenings, of delicate poetry and brutal horse-play. It is a world in which all the senses feast riotously, upon sights and sounds and perfumes; upon fruits and flowers and jewels; upon wines and stuffs and sweets; and upon yielding flesh, both male and female, whose beauty is incomparable. It is a world of heroic amorous encounters, in which men are as potent as that Indian prince of whom Theophrastus spoke, and women as generous as that Queen of Aragon whose amiable decision has been imperishably, if somewhat astonishingly, recorded by Montaigne.

Romance lurks behind every shuttered window; every veiled glance begets an intrigue; and in every servant's hand nestles a scented note granting a speedy rendezvous. It is a world in which any bypath, and often the broad highway, leads straight to unexpected, unpredictable adventure; in which fate plays battledore-and-shuttlecock with men and women of high and low estate; in which no aspiration is so mad as to be unrealizable, and no day proof of what the next day may be. A world in which apes may rival men, and a butcher win the hand of a king's daughter; a world in which palaces are made of diamonds, and thrones cut from single rubies.

It is a world in which all the distressingly ineluctable rules of daily living are gloriously suspended; from which individual responsibility is delightfuly absent. It is the world of a legendary Damascus, a legendary Cairo, and a legendary Constantinople; the world in which a legendary Harun al-Rashid walks the streets of a legendary Baghdad. In short, it is the world of eternal fairy-tale: and there is no resisting its enchantment."

Sublime... I am in for a long magic-carpet ride :)

House of God

Abu Yazid was going on the hajj. It was his custom, when he entered a city, to go first and visit the shaykhs, then any other business. He arrived in Basra and went to the service of a dervish.

He said, "O Abu Yazid, where are you going?"

He said, "To Mecca, to visit the house of God."

He said, "What provisions do you have for the road?"

He said, "Two hundred dirhams."

He said, "Stand up, circumambulate me seven times, and give me the money."

He stood up, undid the money from his waist, kissed it, and placed it before him.

He said, "O Abu Yazid! Where are you going? That is God's house, and this heart of mine is God's house. But, by that God who is the Lord of that house and the Lord of this house, from the moment they built that house, He's never gone inside, and from the moment they built this house, He's never left."

God said: "Neither My heaven nor My earth embraces Me, but the heart of my believing servant does embrace Me."

... Me & Rumi, The Autobiography of Shams-i Tabrizi, William C Chittick

Of Faith

When a mother cries to her sucking baby, "Come, O son,

I am thy mother!"

Does the child answer, "O mother, show a proof

That I shall find comfort in taking thy milk"?

... Mevlana Jalaluddin Rumi

Grouping

There was once a King, who visited the Sage Bahaudin Naqshband, and sat observing his assembly. Afterwards, when they were eating, the King said:

"Teacher of the Age! Your disciples, when you are in Session, are arranged in semicircles, and in an orderly manner very similar to that of my own Court. Is there any significance in this?"

Bahaudin answered:

"King of the World! How are your own courtiers stationed? Tell me, and I shall describe the ordering of the ranks of my students.'

'The first arc' said the King, ' is composed of those who are in especial favour with me, so that they are the nearest. The second array comprises the most important and powerful people in the realm, and the ambassadors. The outer rank is for all the lesser ones.'

'In that case,' said the Sage, ' Our marshalling of the people is far from the intention expressed by you. Those nearest to me are the deaf, so that they shall hear. The middle group is composed of the ignorant, so that they may pay attention to the Teaching. Farthest away are the Enlightened, for whom proximity of this kind is unimportant.'

...Seeker After Truth, Idries Shah

Prayer

This ritual prayer is, according to the Prophet, 'the key to Paradise', and he said to his companions: 'Tell me, if there were a river at someone's door in which he washed five times daily, would any dirt remain upon him?' When they replied that none would remain, he said: 'That is like the five times of prayer by which Allah obliterates sins.'

If only people knew what blessing lies in the Dawn prayer, he told them, 'they would come [to the prayer] even if they had to crawl to do so.' It is little wonder that when the Call to Prayer is made, 'the devil turns his back and breaks wind, so as not to hear the Call being made...' That is the devil's way of evading reality; but men and women, if they are whole and sane, respond.

A man came to the Prophet saying: 'Messenger of Allah, I have done something which merits punishment, so appoint [a punishment] for me!' The Prophet said nothing, and when the time for prayer came, the man prayed with him, then repeated his request for punishment.

'Did you not pray with us?' the Prophet asked him. He agreed that he had done so. 'Well then, Allah has forgiven your offence.'

... Islam and the Destiny of Man, Gai Eaton

Friendship

And a youth said, Speak to us of Friendship.
And he answered, saying:

Your friend is your needs answered.
He is your field which you sow with love and reap with thanksgiving.
And he is your board and your fireside.
For you come to him with your hunger, and you seek him for peace.

When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the"nay" in your own mind, nor do you withhold the "ay".
And when he is silent, your heart ceases not to listen to his heart;
For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared, with joy that is unacclaimed.
When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.
For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofictable is caught.

And let your best be for your friend.
If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also.

For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill?

Seek him always with hours to live.

For it is his to fill your need, but not your emptiness.

And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and the sharing of pleasures.

For in the dew of little things, the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.

... Kahlil Gibran

Exhaustion?

Three good friends (not the three musketeers) went for terawih prayers at the same mosque yesterday. At the end of it, all three were exhausted. One exclaimed: "I will go to a mosque which ends super-duper-faster tomorrow." Yet another said: "I will do just 8 rakaats and then leave."

It was indeed a tiring day yesterday - what with the hot weather. But, Alhamdulillah, at the end of it, a deliciously-fattening-cold-milkshake fixed the problem - and our moods resumed to normalcy.

But, in truth, it is in moments such as yesterday, that the "tastes" of ibadah becomes ever so sweet. As we approach the second-half of this blessed month, we see lesser congregations at the mosques as most people are beginning to feel the 'strain' and 'exhaustion' from the fasting, the weather, the illness etc. Lesser people gather together in the mosques for congregation. Yet, the number of people who gather at night bazaars along Geylang is ever-increasing even cabs refused to pass by. This scenario repeats itself every year.

We are so not logical.

Theologically, there are more reasons to increase our service to The Almighty at home or at the mosques in this second half of Ramadhan.

Indeed, only those with Faith holds patience. Only the 'special ones' persevere. Only those who persevere will be rewarded with Laylatul Qadr.

Only those who search, will find.

It will be easier to give up. But, it takes a real special person to hold on.

What we do, defines us. The rest of our talk, is completely unnecessary.

The Prayer of Abu Bakr

Narrated Abu Bakr as-Siddiq (ra): "I asked the Messenger of Allah (saw) to teach me an invocation so that I may invoke Allah with it in my prayer. He (saw) told me to read [doa as indicated on the left] [Bukhari]

Allahumma innee zhalamtu nafsi zhulman katheera
Wala yaghfiruz zunooba illa anta faghfirlee
Maghfiratam min ‘indika war hamni innaka
Antal Ghafooror Raheem

Translation:
Oh Allah! Indeed I have wronged myself greatly
And no one forgives sins except you, so forgive me
From your forgiveness and have mercy on me, indeed You
And only You are al-Ghafoor (the One who covers up sins in vast quantities), Ar-Raheem (the One who shows mercy in vast quantities)

Sayyidina Abu Bakr as-Siddiq

Alhamdulillah! I did not expect my last entry to draw so many replies. I wish to thank all for your prayers and your well-wishes. And as mentioned in my response, it is indeed important for us to keep each other deep in our prayers always, insya-Allah.

As Allah's creations, making doa is our responsibility and by doing so, we acknowledge our absolute dependence on The Almighty. The fulfilment of those prayers is the job of The One Who Creates - and it is not the place of the created to question the Creator. Through Faith however, the Creator never disappoints His lovers. He alone decides to bestow in time, in manner and in degree.

For He said in the Qur'an: "We are your protectors in this life and in the Hereafter: therein shall ye have all that your souls shall desire; therein shall ye have all that ye ask for! - A hospitable gift from one Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful!" ... Fussilat 41:31-32

You may also noticed that I do not have the usual acompanying pictures since my last entry. My computer's operating system kinda crashed (with all my pictures along with it) and that further explains why of late I have been slow in my entries. But again, Allah knows best, Masya-Allah! When I bought this laptop, I mistakenly installed 2 operating systems without knowing and that has been the butt of jokes amongst my IT-savvy friends. But, Alhamdulillah for that foolish act, I am now still able to use this laptop with the alternative operating system.

I wish to share the beauty of the friendship of the Prophet's companions and shall kickstart with my beloved Sayyidina Abu Bakr (ra). While many do remember him as the first Caliph, I prefer to remember of this great man first and foremost as the passionate, dedicated and loyal best friend of the beloved Prophet (saw). For the Prophet said: "I have two heavenly vicegerents and two earthly vicegerents: Jibril and Mikail, and Abu Bakr and Umar."

Jundub (ra) narrates: “I heard the Prophet (saw) five days before his death saying: "I declare my innocence before Allah that I should have any intimate friend amongst you for Allah Most High has taken me as His friend just as He took Ibrahim as His friend. If I were to take any intimate friend from my nation, I would take Abu Bakr.” [Muslim]

The Prophet (saw) made no "official" appointment of a successor, but left plenty of signs that Abu Bakr was to succeed him as his Khalifa. A woman came to the Prophet (saw) and he ordered her to come back later. When she said: “What if I come back and I don't find you? (indicating his death).” He (saw) said: "If you don't find me, then go to Abu Bakr.” [Bukhari]

Abu Bakr (ra) was the quickest of the Companions to rush to do any good deed. Umar ibn Khattab said: “The Prophet (saw) ordered us to give sadaqah. It happened to coincide with some wealth I had just acquired and I said to myself: 'If I will ever surpass Abu Bakr, this is the day I will surpass him.' And so I came to the Prophet (saw) with half of my wealth and he (saw) said to me: "What have you left for your family?" I said: The same amount. Then, Abu Bakr came with all of his wealth. The Prophet (saw) said to him: "What have you left for your family?" He said: “I have left them Allah and His Messenger.” I said: I will never surpass you (Abu Bakr) in anything.” [Abu Dawood]

He (ra) was the first person to accept Islam amongst men. He was always present for the Prophet (saw) and was the quickest to come to his defense and to affirm and believe everything which came from the Prophet (saw). Narrated Urwa ibn Az-Zubair: 'I asked Amr ibn Al-Aas (ra): What was the most severe thing the mushrikeen ever did to Allah's Messenger? He answered: “Once, when the Prophet was praying in the court of the Ka'abah, Uqba ibn Abi Mu'eet came and put a piece of cloth around his neck and began choking him severely. Abu Bakr came along, grabbed his shoulders and pushed him away from the Prophet saying: “Do you kill a man just for saying my Lord is Allah?” [Bukhari]

He was named ‘As-Siddiq’ - 'the truth verifier’, because he hastened to believe the Prophet (saw). He was so named after the Prophet's journey to Jerusalem, when the Qura'ish refused to believe Prophet Muhammad's journey to Jerusalem within a night. Abu Bakr (ra) when he heard of it, he said: “I have always believed in his words about heavenly revelations; how can I disbelieve him in a secondary worldly matter?”

The Prophet (saw) said: "...Whoever is among the people of prayer will be called (to paradise) from the door of prayer. Whoever is among the people of jihad will be called from the door of jihad. Whoever is among the people of sadaqah will be called from the door of sadaqah. Whoever is among the people of fasting is called from the door of fasting and the door of Ar-Rayaan." Abu Bakr asked "...Is anyone called from all of those doors, O Messenger of Allah (saw)?" He said: “Yes, and I hope that you will be amongst them, Abu Bakr.” [Bukhari]

Once the Prophet (saw) asked the congregation right after the fajr prayers: “Who began this day fasting?” Abu Bakr said: “I did.” The Prophet (saw) said: “Who participated in a funeral procession today?” Abu Bakr said: “I did”. The Prophet (saw) said: “Who fed a needy person today?” Abu Bakr said: “I did”. He (saw) said: “Who visited a sick person today?” Abu Bakr said: “I did”. "Then", the Prophet said: “These things cannot all meet in a single person but that he will enter Paradise.” [Muslim]

Being the closest Companion to the Prophet, Abu Bakr was also the most knowledgeable in both belief and understanding of his teachings as shown in this hadith. He at once knew of the Prophet's impending demise which made him sad, but not understood by those around him. Narrated Abu Sa'id al-Khudri (ra): “Allah's Messenger sat on the pulpit and said: “Allah has given one of his slave, the choice of receiving the splendor and luxury of the worldly life (whatever he likes) or to accept the good (of the Hereafter) which is with Him (Allah). So he has chosen that good which is with Allah.” On that Abu Bakr (ra) wept and said: “May our fathers and mothers be sacrificed for you". We became astonished at this. The people said: “Look at this old man! Allah's Messenger talks about the slave of Allah to whom He has given the option to choose either the splendor of this worldly life or good which is with Him, while he says, “May our fathers and mothers be sacrificed for you.” But it was Allah's Messenger (saw) who had been given the option, and Abu Bakr (ra) knew it better than us.” [Bukhari]

Narrated Anas ibn Malik (ra): “The Prophet (saw) was on Mount Uhud with Abu Bakr, Umar and Uthman when the mountain trembled with awe. He (saw) said: “Stay still, O Mount Uhud: for upon you are a Prophet, a siddique and two martyrs.” [Bukhari]

So, let us take the opportunity of this blessed month to be an "Abu Bakr" to ourselves, and to our friends. Look at the noble examples and the high esteem that the Prophet himself has placed upon this blessed man. We would similarly wish to attain the status that our beloved Prophet (saw) has put on his best friend. Amin.

The Prophet (saw) said: "Do not slander my Companions, for if one of you were to spend even an amount of gold equivalent to the size of Mount Uhud, you would not even come halfway up to their level.” [Bukhari]

The Prayer That Was Answered

It has been one full week of utter disquiet anxiety - I did not have peaceful sleep the whole of the week - getting up intermittently out of sheer nervousness. SubhanAllah!

It started in March this year when the opportunity presented itself - a vista of opportunity to a whole new exciting prospect leading to a path which I am more inclined to lead. An application was thereafter made - but I must confess, bearing in mind how prestigious the programme is worldwide and the stiff competition from other applicants, I was not confident of clearing the preliminaries. All I could do was pray. An edgy and intense wait ensued...

And then sometime in July, I was asked to make submissions of my future plans with the programme. I did as requested and anxiously wait for the next step...

I received a phone call in late August for an interview in early September. That must have been a good sign as I have been selected as the few lucky shortlisted candidates.

Then "The Day" came. I was so nervous that I had so many facts and figures in my head preparing to provide answers to impress the distinguish panel, which constituted of 2 very prominent academics/politicians and 2 other high-ranking members - none of that memorised information were of use as I was not asked those questions. It is all a blur to me now of what transpired - but I knew that, in the context of a succulent steak, I was "grilled to perfection" to the extent that the secretary had to intervene informing the interview panel that my session had exceeded twice the time allocated. I remembered walking out of that room wobbly, and tired. And then, the tormenting and agonising wait, again...

To make the agony more unbearable, I received a few emails after the interview requesting me to submit some essays and take some international graduate tests "in the meantime". What does this "in the meantime" ever means? A following email further asked: "Have you received our letter yet? :)" - complete with the smiley face. My God! I was such a bundle of nerves, I could have flipped anytime anyone calls me. The waiting was truly killing me...

Finally, by the Grace and Mercy of the Almighty, after almost 2 weeks since that fateful interview, I was given the good news on Friday as being successfully chosen to be part of this prestigious programme whose members are luminaries in their own areas of expertise, yet are influential contributors to the world with the world as their network. I remembered I held the letter and stared at it for a moment, read some prayers and opened it. Masya-Allah! The joy that I felt was undescribable - it reminded me of how ecstatic I felt when I was accepted as a scholar with the SSO (Singapore Symphony Orchestra) back when I was in college, some many many moons ago. As William Shakespeare said in The Tempest: "We are such stuff as dreams are made on, rounded with a little sleep."

You would have reckoned by my convoluted reference of the programme that I still intend it to be under wraps until the time for commencement is nearer next year. But, to those very close friends whom I have kept in close confidence, I wish to convey a Huge Thank You for all the prayers, support and the confidence you have placed in me - for I thought this programme to be very special, and through it, you have made me special. At the conclusion of it, I pray that I will join the programme's fraternity in contributing to making positive and beneficial changes to the world.

I realised that one of the blessed manner which has assisted me calm my nerves was this month of Ramadhan. If not for the constant companions of regular doa, reciting the Qur'an and the night prayers (terawih) be it as an Imam or part of the congregation, my heart would not have been in such a blissful state of redha. The Mercy of the Almighty is indeed beyond our human conception.

I wish to end this entry with a beautiful story taken from the Mathnawi of Mevlana Jalalludin Rumi entitled: "The Prayer That Was Answered".

"A certain man one night was reciting 'Allah!' in his zikr till his lips were becoming sweet with the mention of His Name.

'Why now, chatterbox,' said the Devil, 'where is the answer "Here am I" to all this "Allah" of yours? Not one answer is coming from the Throne: how long will you grimly go on crying "Allah"?'

The man became broken-hearted, and laid down his head to sleep. He saw in a dream the mystic Khidr. Khidr was a mysterious guide who first appears in the Quran, Chapter 18:64 (he is not exactly named, but identified as the one cloaked in green by the commentators and as 'one of Our servants unto whom We had given mercy from Us, and We had taught him knowledge proceeding from Us') as accompanying Moses and doing strange things. The Sufis took him as the exempler of the Shaykh who requires absolute and unquestioning obedience of the disciple, all in a green garden.

'Look now,' Khidr called, 'why have you desisted from the mention of God? How is it you repent of having called upon Him?'

'No answering "Here am I" is coming to me,' the man replied, 'and I therefore fear that I may be refused from His door.'

Khidr answered, 'Your cry of "Allah" (God says) is itself My "Here am I"; your pleading and agony and fervour is My messenger. All your twistings and turnings to come to Me were My drawing you that set free your feet. Your fear and love are the lasso to catch My grace. Under each "Allah" of your whispers, there are many a "Here am I".'

My Ramadhan

"What have we got to show for in this blessed month of Ramadhan, despite fasting year after year?

What have we benefitted from our past Ramadhans?"

That marks the opening speech by a travelling Shaykh recently in Singapore and he went on to speak about the relationship of revelation (Qur'an) and the month of Ramadhan. Masya-Allah! It was such beautiful knowledge. It inspired me to delve deeper into myself searching for an answer. So, at the commencement of this blessed month, I resolved to produce something tangible by the end of Ramadhan.

Together with my best buddies at work - the famous "three musketeers" - we made a pact to memorise verses of the Qur'an by the last 10 nights of night vigil for this year. We decided to memorize the chapter of "Ya-Sin". In the meantime, we agreed to meet during lunchtime to pray congregational noon prayer together and check on each other's progress daily. Subhan-Allah! What beautiful companions I have indeed... Alhamdulillah, truly.

In the process of revising my memorization of "Ya-Sin", I have unfortunately realised that my memories of the other chapters have faded. May Allah forgive me. So, before they are completely erased from my mind, in addition to "Ya-Sin", I have started today to begin from "An-Naba'" downwards for revision before going back to "Al-Baqarah".

Whilst I am doing so, I wish to share with you the beautiful Chapter of "An-Naba'", the translation of which is in the clip below.

There are 2 reasons for this entry (and may Allah guide and protect me): I hope to inspire you to find your "tangibles" for your Ramadhan this year, and following this declaration, I am stamping my commitment to myself towards my resolution.

May Allah bless us all in this blessed month. Amin.

Friendship - Keep Holding On

Praises be to Allah, the Almighty - for giving us friends and companions. By nature, we are social creatures who are in need of them and much of our lives are spent interacting with our friends and companions.

Our beloved Prophet (saw) said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows. So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him." [Bukhari & Muslim]

Allah, the All-Wise also says: "Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except for the al-Muttaqoon (ie. those who have Taqwa)" [43:67]

In explaining the verse above, a story on the authority of Ali Ibn Abi Talib (ra) is instructive: "Two who are friends for Allah's sake; one of them dies and is given good news that he will be granted al-Jannah, so he remembered his friend and he supplicated for him, saying: 'O Allah, my friend used to command me to obey You and to obey Your Prophet (saw) and used to command me to do good and to forbid me from doing evil. And he told me that I will meet You. O Allah, do not let him go astray after me, until you show him what you have just shown me, until You are satisfied with him, just like You are satisfied with me.' So he is told: 'Had you known what is (written) for your friend, would you have laughed a lot and cried a little.' Then his friend dies and their souls are gathered, and both are asked to express their opinions about each other. So each one of them says to his friend: 'You were the best brother, the best companion and the best friend.' While on the other spectrum, one of the two disbelieving friends dies, and he is given tidings of Hellfire, he remembered his friend and he said: 'O Allah, my friend used to order me to disobey You and disobey Your Prophet, and commanded me to do evil, and forbade me from doing good, and told me that I would not meet You. O Allah, do not guide him after me, until you show him what you have just shown me and until you are dissatisfied with him just like You are dissatisfied with me.' Then the other disbelieving friend dies, and their souls are gathered, and both are asked to give their opinions about each other. So each one says to his friend: 'You were the worst brother, the worst companion and the worst friend."

I am writing this entry because I know that after so many years, my dear friend has "returned", and he will be reading this Blog today. In fact to me, he never did leave - we both went about Life discovering more of ourselves. The tie that binds us over these years was our faith in each other and in our journey towards Him. The "Long and Winding Road" was not as long and winding as it seems - particularly with someone whom you treat as close as your brother.

I would like to dedicate this entry to that dear brother of mine. Thank you for remembering me in your prayers, everyday, without fail. I am eternally grateful and touched by it - it was probably the reason why I survived on some of my off-days. What I have given seemed miniscule compared to this noble and sincere deed of yours.

In the profound words of the great philosopher, Plato: "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."

Many months ago, while sipping tea and did some 'catching-up', we shared some of our favourite songs. Then, his favourite song was by Avril Lavigne, "Keep Holding On" whereas I offered "Always On Your Side" by Sheryl Crow (a duet with Sting). I think by now you know who you are ... a Big Thank You - and enjoy our songs :)

You are, to me, truly a blessing from Allah, the Most Merciful.

Keep Holding On - Avril Lavigne




Always On Your Side - Sheryl Crow (duet with Sting)

The Wisdom of Rabia

How long will you keep pounding on an open door;
Begging for someone to open it?

***

One day, she was seen running through the streets of Basra carrying a torch in one hand and a bucket of water in the other. When asked what she was doing, she said:
"I want to put out the fires of Hell, and burn down the rewards of Paradise. They block the way to God. I do not want to worship from fear of punishment or for the promise of reward, but simply for the love of God."

***

She prayed: "O Allah! If I worship You for fear of Hell, burn me in Hell,
and if I worship You in hope of Paradise, exclude me from Paradise.
But if I worship You for Your Own sake,
grudge me not Your everlasting Beauty.”

***

Where a part of you goes
The rest of you will follow---given time.
You call yourself a teacher:
Therefore learn.

Being Sick, Hungry and Thirsty

Allah will say on the Day of Judgment, ‘O son of Adam, I was sick and you did not visit Me.’ He will say, ‘O my Lord, how could I visit You, when you are the Lord of the Worlds.’ Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so and so was sick and you did not visit him? Did you not know that if you had visited him, you would have found Me there?’

Allah will say, ‘O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not.’ He shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I feed you when you are the Lord of the Worlds?’ And Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so and so was looking for food and you did not feed him? Did you not know that if you had fed him, you would have found that to have been for Me?’

‘O son of Adam, I asked you for water and you did not give Me to drink.’ The man shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I give You water, when You are the Lord of the Worlds?’ Allah will say, ‘My servant so and so asked you for water and you did not give him to drink water. Did you not know that if you had given him to drink, you would have found that to have been for Me.’ [Muslim]

Take then in this blessed month of Ramadhan, the merciful opportunity to do right...

Of Hoofbeats and Zebra

Fasting is the only worship of Allah done in total secrecy. Only Allah knows … We pray openly in front of other people, it is seen. When we give charity, we give it out. But fasting is a secret between each person and Allah. And only Allah knows whether you do it or don’t do it. You can stay home and eat three meals a day and tell people you’re fasting. Nobody knows. Only Allah knows. And you know.

But fasting from food is just a small part of Ramadan. We have to fast from our anger. We have to fast from being greedy, being unkind, being unfriendly. We have to have a fast of speech. Only say things that we really mean. Only hear those things that are necessary for us to hear … No frivolity.

Think, think about how you will make your next Ramadan. And like anything that’s worth something, prepare for it.

Allah comes very close to the believers during Ramadan. He gives us the most wonderful opportunity to see who we are and how we are.